Wednesday, March 10, 2021

Starting from Scratch

I can't lie. It feels weird to be blogging as if everything is all right. Peanuts, everything is NOT all right. If I am being honest, it hasn't been all right for over a year and a half now. I'm going to tell you a little story. 

Somewhere between the best day of her life and today, a vintage gal lost her way. Things were going so well...but then it all began to fall apart and no matter how much she desperately tried to grab a hold and patch the cracks appearing at an alarming rate, it all just crumpled between her fingertips. 

She lost her baby, then she lost her job, and then she lost her partner. She lost her passion and the spark in her eye. She also lost her home. She still doesn't have many answers or understands how everything fell apart so fast (and so easily) and she certainly has no idea what will happen moving forward, but she hopes to find peace somewhere in the future.

But TODAY. Today she has a place to call her own (here's a peek at my new dressing area in my loft-style bedroom!), her kitty, Rubix, by her side (we're roomies), and a new job that she is actually excited to have. She has her book available for sale on Amazon and at Tatnuck Bookseller (a book store in Westborough, MA) and has this amazing new dress made by hand (and embroidered!) by her gal, Jen from the Dressing with Class blog. She has her circle of people and a smidge of hope. 

It's a smidge, but it's there. 

For now, that is all I want to say. All I can do is take it one day at a time and hope to find my way again. It's a terrifyingly lonely feeling when literally every aspect of your life is suddenly torn apart. I keep holding Rubix close and climbing toward the light I can (finally) just sort of see at the end of this extremely long tunnel. 

Frankly, adopting Rubix was one of the only good things to happen between 2019 and 2021 (other than my little nephew, Colin, being born and Pas de Deux being published!). But, I digress. 

My laptop also finally gave up on me as well during all this so I may not have a new blog up for another few weeks while I wait for my new one to arrive. I appreciate your patience while I reset!

So here's to 2021 and the big, unknown, scary, new, raw, possible future...